Saturday, July 26, 2008

Original Works of Wally

While conversing with people throughout the day I like to laugh, and make others laugh...

"Are you going to BBQ some cute little animals..."
Before a national holiday

"Bring back some chocolate covered gila monsters..."
When someone visits Arizona

"Bring back some chocolate covered iguanas..."
When someone visits South America

"Bring back some chocolate covered potatoes..."
When someone visits Idaho

"Can't they afford to hire a peon to do that for you..."
When an employee is doing a mundane task at work

"Did you BBQ some cute little animals..."
After a national holiday

"He's cute!... "
Implying homosexuality & demonstrating masculinity while with a girl

"He don't even have no hair..."
When a balding man makes fun of another balding man

"Hey, don't try to use big words on me..."
When a woman uses a big word while conversing with you

"I like my coffee like my women; light & sweet..."
While conversing with an attractive gringa in a coffee shop

"I like my coffee like my women; hot and dark..."
While conversing with an attractive woman of color in a coffee shop

"I like my salsa like my waitress', hot and spicy..."
When ordering Mexican food from an attractive waitress

"I love that song..."
When you hear an obscure song you've never heard before

"It's nothing a deep friction massage won't cure..."
When someone is talking about their painful injury

"That cow was a vegetarian before they killed it..."
When you are eating meat with a bunch of vegetarians

"The greatest respect I can show you is to call you my dog..."
When showing respect to a dear friend in gang lingo

"There ought to be a law against that..."
When some shares with you a crime event

"There's always room for one more in there..."
When you come across a woman enjoying the waters edge

"They don't even trust people!"
When conversing about people doing their job like airport security, IRS agent, people asking for an ID, etc.

"You could fly to Mexico with those ears..."
Commenting on a cute little dog with big ears

"What are you, Anti-American..."
When someone says they don't like pizza, sushi, etc...

"Wouldn't it be so romantic if a guy just walked up to you and said "will you be my found treasure?""
When you see a pretty girl looking for shells on the beach

"Wouldn't it be so romantic if he just carried you across?"
When a man is helping his lady friend walk along rocky shores

"You call that a cute little chihuahua..."
When someone is walking a pit bull

"You call that a pit bull..."
When someone is walking a cute little chihuahua

"You love New York?...I love New York!
When a woman is wearing a "I Love New York" shirt

http://www.news3online.com/index.php?code=65o157Ir20ugM61GYv1p

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